The problem with Barbie - an issue of self image.

We give our children dolls to play with that are so sexualised (breast/waist/hip ratio) that if those proportions were on a real woman she’d be anorexic and unable to walk on two legs.

Then we wonder why our kids grow up with unrealistic body expectations and low self esteem.

As I write this, the Barbie Movie is causing mass excitement all over the world – and all over my social media feed. Like most of us, I grew up with Barbies, and loved them.

It was only as a parent that I started to question whether they were appropriate for little girls to be playing with.

We bought my daughter her first Barbie-like doll with good intentions. She was a “Hijabi Barbie”, covered in beautiful modest clothing with a matching hijab. My daughter’s second Barbie was an Ibtihaj Muhammed – a Muslimah Olympian also dressed modestly, in hijab, in her fencing team’s uniform.

We quickly realised that what Barbies come dressed in is insignificant. The clothes all get taken off eventually during play, whether it is for an outfit change or for a “bath”. Which is why Barbie’s body shape is important.

It’s not direct. It’s a subtle, almost unconscious message. A subtle awareness that maybe this is what a woman should look like, should dress like. It’s subliminal. Shaytaan takes us by degrees, starting from childhood.

Over the years, as I’ve become more aware, my children and I have had discussions:

“Do you know the people who created these Barbie dolls are so silly, they made them in impossible sizes. If these dolls were women in real life, they’d look so funny! They wouldn’t even be able to walk properly, they’d fall over! You will never, EVER find a real life person that has a body like Barbie. How silly.”

We don’t buy Barbie paraphernalia, we don’t buy into the Barbie branding. We certainly don’t sing the Barbie song with questionable lyrics  (“you can brush my hair…undress me everywhere?!”). Barbies are not something we want my children to look up to or be obsessed with. 

We DO play with dolls though – remembering fondly that Ayesha RA used to have a doll. And we have other dolls that are NOT sexualised – baby dolls, a Salaam Sister (and hopefully soon, a Mighty Girls Doll).

 We also celebrate femininity with pretty clothes, hair accessories, jewellery etc – Allah swt has given women and girls beauty and we embrace that. But Barbie doesn’t set the standard for us for that.

I’m hearing all sorts of reviews of the Barbie Movie and debates as to whether it is suitable for children, for Muslims, what kind of messaging it contains…but for me, that doesn’t matter. The issues with Barbie as a role model for kids existed before, and will continue to exist after, the current movie craze.